Cross-posted from my Facebook
Recently, I've been saddened to see a number of my posts devolve into personal attacks, name-calling, and overt disrespect.
Facebook posts are not anonymous public spaces. I have control over my posts so I think it makes sense to set guidelines of conduct. I encourage you to set your own, and feel free to copy or share mine.
If you are commenting on a status of mine, I ask that you:
(a) Assume best intentions as a first tactic
The person you're talking to is probably a friend of mine, though I may not agree with their views. Please treat them as such.
Dialogue over text is hard. You don't know the other person's state of mind, they may not have articulated clearly, and you may be misunderstanding.
(b) Speak with respect
Make statements without shutting other people down, unless it is absolutely necessary. (And even then, do it respectfully.)
(c) State your thoughts without resorting to personal attacks or name-calling
This doesn't mean you can't hold someone accountable or state your mind. It's possible to address the content and impact of peoples' statements rather than their presumed intention or character.
(d) Hold bigotry, prejudice, and subjugation accountable
If you think someone's perspective has harmful consequences to others, please call them in! If you decide to take on that task, I ask that you engage with respect and out of an intention to educate.
Do: I don't think that's accurate. 53% of ____ actually ____.
Do: That comment was not very kind.
Do: Alright, this isn't going anywhere. I'm out.
Don't: I've had it with you libtards thinking you can ____.
Don't: Clearly you know nothing about _____.
Don't: It's people like you who ______.
If you can't follow these guidelines, take it somewhere else. I'm not promising that I will message you, delete the comment, or respond, but I might. That takes time that I might not have in the moment, but if someone is a troll and an asshole, it will eventually be addressed.
My personal belief is that FB is not the place to convince people about fundamental disagreements. If someone's opinion is opposite to yours and you're 3+ comments in, I'd be happy to start a 3-way chat thread to continue the conversation. (If arguing in public is much more interesting to you, I'd examine your intentions.)
Thanks all! I've been really happy about the level of discourse we've managed to have on a platform designed for pretty pictures. It's always fun to see where threads go and I hope we can continue having interesting conversations online and in person <3